Last year's scrapbook - Jungle

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This blog was reset a few times and it's mostly no great loss, but I miss the digital scrapbook pages I made last year. I think it started as a way to memorize words in Thai, or an attempt to indulge in making roleplaying props without actually roleplaying, or possibly to make use of AI images that deeply moved me but, being AI, are morally wrong. I can't remember; but it developed into being a sort of journaling-with-images thing. And that blog is gone, and there weren't too many of them, so I'm just going to re-post them here. 

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When I was a kid I dreamt of knights and fairies and green meadows and rain, which stood to reason, what with being a D&D player who lived in the desert in a town where most teens cared mostly for surfing. Then I grew up and realized that rain was cold, that green meadows were also cold, that sunshine on said meadows didn't necessarily mean it's warm, and that I hate the cold.

And somewhen in my 30s I realized what I now fantasized about was jungles and the idealized age of exploration (without, you know, the colonialism and racism and genocide) and tropical shores. And then I moved to the jungle and that feeling wasn't there, not even as I sat with a drink on the beach, so I guess it's a place I can only go in specific roleplaying, and that, too, has been a while.

But I realize I'm talking bull, because that page isn't about that at all. I think it's about missing Jammer, who's the only person I know who understands, and the text in the background pretty much spells it out. Amazing how blind I could be when I made it. 





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